So, if you're reading this site, you're no doubt familiar with Tobe Hooper's 1974 original The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Well, you'd better be familiar with it, fuckers, because if you're not, I'm going to personally come through your computer screen and kick your flowery little ass. Then I'm going to make you watch this movie...over, and over, and over, and over again until you get it through your thick skulls that this movie...this one movie...is almost single-handedly responsible for just about every "extreme" horror film that came after it. Don't believe me? Well, by the end of this review, you're damned well going to believe me. Again, it's either that, or I come through your computer screen, etcetera, etcetera. Suffice it to say that you'll either get it, or else copious butts will be kicked in ample measure. So, moving on. I know that there have been roughly 432,000 editions of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre available on DVD over the years, and like most of you, I own pretty much every single one of 'em; being suckered into buying them by companies that should know better than to blatantly risk alienating their buyers by simply repackaging the same print, the same extras, the same commentary over and over again. Still, we snatched 'em up, on the hopes that maybe...just maybe...there would be some hidden "easter egg" or something on there that wasn't advertised, so that we could learn that much more about this beloved classic. No dice, though. The worst offendor (probably) was that god-awful release that looked like (seriously) a package of hamburger meat. I'm not kidding. It's still available on some shelves. While that packaging was, ostensibly, "clever", it was still just the same ol' "Chain Saw", with that same commentary we've all heard a million times and can practically quote from. Enough bitching, though...because here, out of the fuckin' wild blue yonder, comes Dark Sky Films...a company that, to me, is slowly but surely usurping Anchor Bay's position as "King of Horror DVD Releases". That's not a slur against the mighty Anchor Bay, of course...it's just a heads-up. Attention Anchor Bay: you're about to re-learn just how to release a package that makes literally everyone happy. Words to the wise.
Note: If you're familiar with my reviews, you'll know that I generally feature three (or more) hand-selected screen captures throughout the body of each DVD review. In this case, you'll notice that I have not included any screen captures. The reason for this exclusion is that (as noted in technical review portion of this review near the bottom of this page) Dark Sky Films sent me a "screener" copy of the complete release. The feature film itself has burned-in and unremovable "For Screening Purposes Only" titles throughout the entire film. In the interest of fairness, and wanting to portray this exemplary release in as positive a light as possible, I have omitted the screenshots this time, since they're pretty glaring and may detract somewhat from your impression of the overall excellent quality of the print Dark Sky used for this release. At a later date, I may come back in and "update" this review to include un-marred screenshots for your viewing pleasure. In the meantime, please excuse the absence of screenshots, and the resulting text-heaviness of this review. Now, on with the review...
UPDATE: I've added proper screenshots from Dark Sky's final release version of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. Enjoy!
The synopsis...
Well, actually...I'm not going to waste a lot of time synopsizing The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, as most of you are (or should be...see my dire warning in the previous paragraph) familiar with the plot. But, for those of you whom have been living under a fucking rock for the last 32 years, here's a brief summary: group of teens goes on a van trip (hey, it was the '70's, after all) in Texas, said group of teens runs afoul of a really nasty hitchhiker guy (Edwin Neal), said group of teens get freaked out by said hitchhiker guy, said group of teens stop at a gas station where they are warned by creepy but friendly gas-station-attendant (Jim Siedow) not to go pokin' their pretty little heads in the wrong place, said group of teens eschews all reason and rationality by pokin' their pretty little heads in the wrong place, said group of teens run afoul of creepy family (consisting of creepy hitchhiker guy, creepy but...ahem...friendly gas-station-attendant, and their younger brother, known of course as "Leatherface") in their creepy, run-down, bone-strewn house, and said teens are whittled down one by one until only token hot blonde Sally (a screechy Marilyn Burns) remains. Finally, the creepy family taunt and torture token hot blonde, and try to feed her to "Grandpa". Token hot blonde (somehow) escapes, and laughs insanely as she is driven away in the back of a pickup truck, because she knows that for her, the nightmare is just beginning...mwuhahahaha. Fade out. Whew.
OK. Well, now that that's out of the way, let's talk a bit about why The Texas Chain Saw Massacre is such an important film. Don't worry...I'm not going to get too pretentious on you. The first order of business I'd like to get out of the way is the fact that Hooper's film is not particularly gory. Most of the people I've ever met whom have only seen this flick one or two times would swear that it is an incredibly gory film, replete with graphic shots of the titular "saw" slicing into teenaged flesh with reckless abandon, meat hooks going into, through, and back out of people's bodies in gruesome close-up, and other similar spectacles of gratuitiously bloody mayhem. The truth of the matter is, of course, that by far the bloodiest and mostly truly "explicit" scene in the movie comes near the very beginning, when the creepy hitchhiker guy slices his own hand with his razor, and shortly after slices the sweaty arm of Franklin...that fat, wheelchair-bound bastard we all love to hate. When he slices Franklin's arm, we see a specific wound occuring, the corresponding "blood trail" forming, and an appropriate amount of blood spurting from the wound. But it's only like, at most, a two second shot. After that, damned near everything that happens to a character is suggested, but not really shown, including the infamous "meathook" sequence. Sure, we "see" it happen, but all we really see is a girl being lifted up...kicking and screaming quite convincingly, I might add...and hung up on something. She then makes an appropriately panicked and fearful set of grimaces and gasps, but that's it. That's just one example of the restraint that Hooper and company used during the making of Chain Saw. It's commonly known that Hooper was originally hoping to secure a "PG" rating upon the film's release. Obviously (and rightly so), the then-young MPAA had other ideas, but frankly, we're actually looking at a remarkably restrained...almost conservative movie here. There's no nudity, an almost total lack of profanity, extremely little gore/blood, negligible drug/alcohol use, and pretty much nothing else truly offensive in the film. In fact, were it not for the oppressively grim tone and hideous subject matter, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre is almost wholesome!
And there's the rub; the sheer weight and ickiness of the goings-on are enough...despite the lack of gore...to make this one seriously over-the-top scare fest. There aren't too many movies that can boast that kind of success. Even The Exorcist, widely regarded as one of the scariest movies ever made, couldn't truly succeed without having its shocking subject matter backed up and reinforced by its comparatively explicit shock sequences. Not so with Chain Saw. This is a movie that truly convinces the viewer...even the viewer (like myself) whom has watched and studied every frame of the film time and again...that he/she has seen something that he/she hasn't actually seen. Then, there's the pervasive tone of sheer insanity, as typified by the climactic "dinner" sequence. The first-hand anecdotes and accounts concerning the filming of this sequence are as well...if not better...known as the sequence itself; the 110 degree Fahrenheit heat on the set, the quickly rotting sausages sitting there on the table, the ripeness of Gunnar Hansen's costume, and the ever-mounting insanity that overtook the participants due to a combination of long working hours and the aforementioned set conditions. This scene, put simply, is terrifying insanity literally put on screen.
If it's not apparent by now, let me tell you that I could go on and on forever about the scope and breadth of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre's quality and influence. But, I'm going to save that for another time. Just don't forget that TCM is the first truly modern horror film, and despite its lack of gore, it's the first truly "extreme" horror film, as well. Like many directors whom originally found their voice in the 1970's, Tobe Hooper has had a mixed track record, finding it difficult (if not impossible) to live up to the fiercely burning flame that was Chain Saw. From time to time, he's hit a few really good notes (e.g. Poltergeist, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre Part 2, The Toolbox Murders), but for the most part, he's released a nearly uninterrupted string of really solid stinkers (e.g. the recent Mortuary among them). But, like John Carpenter and Wes Craven, Hooper will always live and perform in the great, looming shadow of his first foray into the world of horror. Draw from that whatever significance you will, but I'll finish by saying that by the time I die, if I've done anything on par with The Texas Chain Saw Massacre...even if the rest of my life's work is incredibly mixed...I'll be a happy man indeed. So, for what it's worth, Mr. Hooper, no matter what you do, we'll always love you, if only because of the gift of a rusty, incessantly-buzzing chainsaw and a guy in a mask of human skin.
Now, on to the DVD itself. I mentioned earlier that many DVD distributors feel the need to re-release movies like this every year or so, with nothing but a fancy new package by which to differentiate them. Let this release from Dark Sky be a lesson to you all; The Texas Chain Saw Massacre Two-Disc Ultimate Edition is not only worth the purchase, but it effectively replaces all the editions of the film that have come before. The reasons for this are numerous and noteworthy. First of all, we have the brand-new print, which is sourced from the original negatives as usual, but has been given a true High Definition remastering. Now, I don't have an HDTV, so for now I can't watch this release in the full scale of its intended glory. However, I've done side by side comparisons between this print and a couple of others I have, and this is by far the superior version. The audio, likewise, has been remastered, and the two choices here are the original 2.0 Mono and a sparkly and clear 5.1 Surround track. So, for you folks out there who demand damn-near technical perfection from your remastered classics, Dark Sky's release fits the bill nicely. The real raison d'etre for this "Ultimate Edition", and the reason why it lives up to its name (for a change) are the copious extras. We've got the tried-and-true commentary from director Hooper, Director of Photography Daniel Pearl, and star Gunnar Hansen. This is the track we all know and love, which has been ported over from the now-classic laserdisc presentation to many, many DVD release of Chain Saw. Even though it's so familiar, it's pretty much par for the course, so its inclusion here makes sense. But wait...there's also a "brand new" commentary with cast members Marilyn Burns, Paul Partain, and Allen Danziger, plus art director Robert A. Burns. "Brand New" is in quotes because this commentary was recorded about two years ago. Still, it's "previously unreleased" to my knowledge, and it's a wonderful track, filled with the expected humor and just a hint of melancholy, as both Paul "Franklin" Partain and Robert Burns have passed away since recording it. On disc two, we've got a truly amazing set of documentaries, featuring recollections and ruminations from damn-near everyone involved with Chain Saw. These documentaries are worth the price of the set all by themselves, and they provide a lovely, funny, sometimes bittersweet perspective on how this low budget film changed so many lives...not to mention how it shaped an industry. It's official...unless you are a total DVD masochist or a completist (like me) who simply must own every single edition of this film, Dark Sky's "Ultimate Edition" not only lives up to its name, but it makes all previous versions/editions obsolete. One note: the version that I'm reviewing here is the complete retail release, with the following exceptions: my review copy does not come in the beautiful tin collector's box in which the final retail version will be packaged, and my review copy has that annoying "For Screening Purposes Only" burned into the print of the film itself (though, not the supplements and documentaries). That's splitting hairs, though, and I'm thankful that I was able to get an advanced look at this beautiful release.
OK. Enough is enough. The Texas Chain Saw Massacre is a film about which I could talk and talk...and talk...for literally weeks at a time. Like so many die-hard fans of the original film, I've pored over every frame of this puppy that it's like an old friend. Sure, it's an old friend that gives you the creeps, but it's still an absolutely essential piece of American Horror Cinema. Dark Sky Films' "Ultimate Edition" does that legacy due justice quite nicely, and it's the version that I'll return to over and over for many years to come. At least until somebody unearths more deleted footage, or something. Don't miss it!
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The Atrocities Cinema Scoreboard
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- Matthew Dean Hill - September 13, 2006
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